Friday 14 January 2011

Tears

"Why do you cry?" they asked

I cry because you asked me that question. I cry because your manipulation and ignorance knows no bounds. I cry because you ARE, in essence, the very thing that you despise and fight against. I cry because you project your self-hatred upon me. I cry because I am here, uninvited yet unable to leave, and you so callously sweep aside my presence amongst strangers. I cry because you hide the truth from me. I cry because the lies are insulting. I cry because I see the dark and no matter how hard I try I can no longer see the light. I cry because I am killing my emotions, hour by hour, day by day. I cry because the murder of my soul is because of you. I cry with clean hands as I look at your blood soaked elbows, emerging from the hole in my chest that makes me cry.

The definition of my tears is disillusionment. It is hatred borne of love, care and respect. Where warmth once lived, there is now only despair and a locked door.

I cry because the thought of ever feeling again makes me vomit.
I write it down because I am terrified of that being the truth.
At least I can still cry.

~ Charlotte Sometimes (SRWB) 2011

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