Insomnia

The room is high above the world
I line up a 12 minute remix
I hate this job and I need time
Time to smoke and breathe
I turn around to look for my cigarettes
I can't find them
But I find you
And there you are, smiling
That fucking smile!
You can't shock me or break me
Because I will not crack, ever!
You don't give up
Yet I know I am about to give in
I lose the battle like a maiden in distress
Artfully performed of course
You have my smokes
You taunt me with them
Holding them out and taking them away
Finally dropping them on the floor
I frown and you laugh as you grab me
9 minutes left
My head echoes the plaster
As I slam against the wall
Hands, pushing roughly
That sick smile still on your face
I lose the fight too easily
And let you in
Pulling, pushing, grabbing, biting
The fabric of my clothes as broken as my body
And mind
4 minutes left
You pound yourself into me harder
Your breathing fast and hard in my neck now
2 minutes and I scream
Shit... I gave in
What the fuck am I going to do now?
You come back, again and again
My time is over here, I light a cigarette
But all I really want is a drink
Again and again, you are in front of me
With that smile and that look
You reach out and grab my hair
Not letting me look away
As you unbuckle your belt
You have me where you want me...again
And again
And again...

~ Copyright Charlotte Sometimes (SRWB) 2008